Thursday, April 22, 2010
I just realized that I have had RA for about 9 1/2 years. That's almost a third of my life. I know there are folks that have had it for much, much longer. But, cripes, that's a long time to be in pain. It's long enough for me to not remember very well how it feels to have a body that isn't RA-ridden. I'm not feeling down in the dumps about it, or anything. It was just a shock to realize just how much of my life I've had it. Maybe that's a good thing? The not remembering? I mean, this is really and truly my life now. I can't imagine waking up without some form of pain, or things being easy. Even if they were to find a cure tomorrow, I would still have lasting pain and struggles because I have too much damage in too many joints (and too many future surgeries to even think about). I guess it makes me feel kind of positive to recognize the RA, know that it will sometimes kick my butt, but to also know that I can deal with it. Whatever it brings.