Thursday, March 13, 2014

I wanna thank my buddy, Beans, over at Trauma Dad, for a recent post in which he talked about ugly-ness, and also linked to a pretty inspiring Ted talk by Lizzie Velasquez . Lizzie's parting words to the audience was getting them to question what defined them.

I know some people with RA, and other disabilities, really hate to be defined by their disease or disability, but I am not one of them. It certainly isn't ALL that I am, but it is a part of me. It's a part of me visually (in my strange movements, stiffness, limp, or crutches/wheelchair) and it's a part of me emotionally, mentally, intellectually, and every other -y.

It's in everything I do, helping me make decisions about whether I should get up, how I should get up, should I really get up? It's always in the back of my head (and my feet, neck, knees, wrists, shoulders, you get the idea). I have to factor it in to my plans - should I really go for a ski-doo ride on Saturday and Sunday? The answer is yes, by the way. Yes, go for those ski-doo rides, but be prepared to spend Monday, and probably Tuesday, and maybe even Wednesday, on the couch recovering (worth it).

Having this disease can really, really suck, and I often wish I didn't have it. Or, that it was less severe, with less pain, requiring less surgeries, etc. I can get pretty down about it. But, I don't have any problem in using it as defining part of who I am. I am a woman with a disability. The important part, for me, is recognizing that that definition does not make me "lesser than". It just is.

8 comments:

  1. Thanks so much for this. The last paragraph...the whole thing...

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks! I can be a pretty grumpy person in general, but you really have to find the positives in this, or else it's depression-time.

      Delete
  2. Nice to see you back Pony. A powerful post that touches on a very important and difficult life choice. Reveal or try to hide. I also voted to reveal. Jeez it was too hard to hide. Yay for ski- doo ride Ra be damned!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you! Yes, I reached a point where you don't even care who knows, and it's too darn hard to hide anyway!

      Delete
  3. Shit yes Steesh! Down but not out, right? Love you lady. Miss you so much.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Exactly, Beans! Your blogging has inspired me to get back at it. I love the community.

      We miss you guys so much, too! I could use a little friday night hang-out. I even miss our arguing over which crappy movie to watch :)

      Love you!

      Delete
    2. I still argue with you, in my heart. Haha!

      Delete
  4. Dear Pony,
    Hope you are doing well. Also hope to connect with you via email. Is there an address where I can send you a note? Many thanks in advance.

    ReplyDelete